Happy Birthday to US!!!!
What is it like to be a twin?!

Shar & Nicole on our 25th Birthday! (yes we match...see story below)

Shar & Nicole March 2006


Okay, this post is, first, to say Happy Birthday to my wonderful and amazing sister! And second, to reminisce about what it was like growing up with a twin. Our entire lives we have gotten lots of questions, some funny, some lame, some very strange and some not even worth mentioning. But one question AlWaYs pops up and it is this:
What is it like being a twin?
My usual response to this question was: "well, what is it like NOT to be?" It's normal for me, so I don't have anything else to compare it to! And then people will usually ask if we liked being twins, etc. Well, again, when you don't have anything to compare it to, you are what you are. I don't feel extraordinary, or different than anyone else, or strange in any way. I have liked my life, I have liked my sister. And then again, there were times when I definitely did NOT! But I think that any singleton out there (that's what I'll call you non-twin/triplet/multiple birth folk) would have had days like that as well.
So, on to the reason why I am writing this post. As usual, when my birthday rolls around, I think about myself and Shar, our relationship, and how we've grown through the years. On a recent trip to Texas I had some of these twin questions asked of me, which I honestly don't mind answering, but I gave my usual, pat answers. So this, Aunt Betsy, is for you. :)
What is it like being a twin?
I have realized that I have taken for granted one of the biggest blessings in my life, and that is Shar. I have had a best friend since the day that I was born. Not just a friend who says hello/goodbye at the end of the day, but one who has lived with the same people, gone to the same school, shared the same room (until we were old enough to rotate getting our own) and gone through pretty much every first together. When I say 'gone through' I mean, that we were there for each other. Not all of our 'firsts' happened at the same time, or while we were together, but we listened, we talked, we cried, we shared, etc.
I think Heavenly Father knew that I was a big wimp and so I needed, not just parents and cool siblings, but a special person who would, literally, be there through it all! And she has.
Those who know us both, know that we are VERY different, however, despite growing up together! (but the same in a lot of ways too..haha, confusing, huh?!)
Being a twin means sharing a LOT of things. This is also a lesson I had to learn (maybe I wasn't as nice of a person as some!) I didn't always love having to plan a birthday with Shar because I wanted my OWN day. But now we LOVE sharing- and the cool thing is- since we've been pregnant at different times, we get to share clothes! Right now I have a lot of her 'thin' wardrobe and she has my maternity stuff! How cool is that?!
We were often compared, mostly by people outside the family. Or maybe it just felt that way. But I don't think it created a competition between us-- my parents did a wonderful job of making sure we were able to do the things we wanted to, and not getting pushed into one interest because that's what the other was doing.
Being a twin has also meant that, occasionally, we have shown up in similar and even matching outfits. UGGG! Okay, I will tell all of you now that maybe matching is cool if you are NOT a twin, but when you have a twin everyday and people say 'who is who,' 'I can't even tell you apart,' 'you look exactly alike,' YEAH, matching is NOT the way to go!!!!! But, one of our similarities is that we like some of the same clothing. On our 24th birthday we both showed up at the party in pink tops and black pants. At least they weren't exactly the same outfit, no THAT happened on our 25th birthday. (Pictured above) Yes, we both showed up in the same green top and black pants and I swear, it was not planned!!! There really is not much that is more embarassing!
Random twin memories: sitting back to back to open birthday gifts because they were the same thing- just different colors and we didn't want to 'see' it before we got our own opened, sharing a car that we hated to drive because it was a standard, sharing a car at Ricks college (I am sorry roommates for the years Shar & I didn't get along....we're much better now!), being recognized on campus by people I had never met in my life, switching places in Jr. High ONCE (not that great), having the same comforter - but different colors- all through elementary school, oh gosh, the list goes on. But see, my memories are probably similar to yours...pretty much like anyones' who has a sibling.
Okay, I am really wanting to read my new book, Eclipse, before Weston wakes up from his nap, so I am going to end this. Sorry if all of your 'twin' questions weren't answered, I did try to shed a little light on the query, though!
So, all in all, I will have to say that being a twin has ups and downs (much much much more ups), like it does with any sibling! But I am so incredibly grateful that I get to go through this life with such an awesome person who knows, right when I turn 27, how horrible it feels to be 27! (haha. It actually feels pretty great, 30 is the one I'm not really looking forward to!) At this moment, especially after writing this post, I am feeling pretty special, and wonderful, and extraordinary because I have a twin. How lucky am I?!
Happy Birthday Shar!!!